Comfortable

I realize now why I never seem to get comfortable with life. I prayed that God would not make me too comfortable years back. Because I know that if He does, I may just loose site of Him and learn to not rely on him.
I moved from my home to a different world when I left for Master's Commission in FL back in 2001. I moved from a place I was beginning to get much more comfortable in 2 years later and ended up at Liberty in VA. At that point I had no clue what was in store for my future. I met my husband, Jared Lowe there. We got married and I left behind the place where I was born and did not expect to be going back 2 years later. Once again, I was sitting in my comfort zone down in Virginia. I was leaving a place where I went to school and worked with other believers. I lived in a city where half of the population were Christians. Where I was beginning to find my gnitch in close friendships and church... Only to what?? Leave again.

We got up to NH and it was such a wake up call. The only Christians I knew where those in my family and church. And going from a church filled with 500 people to maybe 30-50 people attending, I was no longer just the one of many in the back row. God stepped me out of my comfort zone incredibly as I began my first journey as a Pastor's wife. Mistakes? Oh yes, plenty! Lessons learned? Yes! Blessings experienced? Yes! Deserts walked through? Definitely. And so on. Even within those 3 years, I knew God was preparing us for something more in the future. He grew my husband amazingly. He worked in my heart in numerous ways. Ways I did not like, and ways that were encouraging. But I ask myself, WHY? Why can't I just relax and get comfortable in one place? Why so much moving around in my life? Not just places, or churches, but even just life.

I have two amazingly beautiful girls right now. That has been by far the most incredible blessing ever in my life in the last almost 3 years we have left VA. I would never want to change that. They are going to be with us on this journey. And the thought of that can be really uncomfortable as a Mommy. Why? Because I have never had to move around growing up. The most I had was moving in a bigger house right on the same street I lived on. I do believe God will lead us to His perfect place and ministry for my husband, but I pray that now with children we can actually settle and let them experience life in a healthy church and not constantly moving. But I won't stop praying for God to not let me get comfortable in my walk with Him, because I know if I do, my trust and reliance will go downhill and I can end up in a desert of complacency. And that can be a scary place.